A Beautiful Song

I was writing this post on All Women Stalk-http://music.allwomenstalk.com/best-breakup-songs-for-valentines-day

when I found this song. I remember hearing it in 2001-2, and it was every bit as heart-wrenching then as it is now. I don’t know how to embed videos and I’m not sure it would even be legal for me to do that (copyright laws are odd that way…), but here’s the link.

I hope you like it! It made me cry the first few times I’ve heard it…I think we can all relate to our feelings for someone hanging on long after they’re gone.  I know I can.



Dear Evangelicalism: I Don’t Think This Relationship Is Going To Work.

Dear Evangelicalism: I Don’t Think This Relationship Is Going To Work.

Phenomenal Woman : A Poem for Lady

Phenomenal Woman : A Poem for Lady.

5 Things Women Should Stop Apologizing For (Assuming We Ever Did)

“Lo siento”

“Je suis désolé.”

“Mi dispiace.”

“Es tut mir leid.”

“I’m sorry.”

I tend to apologize a lot for things I don’t need to. Sometimes it’s to keep the peace, but mostly it’s because I’m a ‘people-pleaser’ and feel guilty every time someone expresses the slightest bit of frustration with me. This has been my undoing so many times that I’ve come to think that the words, ‘I’m sorry’ should be banished from every language on the planet. I know I’m not alone in this. There are a few things, though, that I will never apologize for. In fact, I don’t think any woman should. The list is pretty long, but here are the five things that I feel are the most important.

1) Standing up for herself. I know several women who were raised not to show anger or frustration. Apparently they were supposed to ignore things that bothered them for the sake of being ‘ladylike’. Some of these women are from England, a society many people think would be ‘beyond’ this sort of thing. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard the assumption of PMS, I’d be able to buy the moon. Ditto being called a ‘bitch’. Comments like that say a lot more about the person making them than they do about us.

2) Not looking (or even wanting to look) like a supermodel. That’s the whole point of this magazine-celebrating those of us who have curves! Marilyn Monroe, a woman who is considered the bastion of beauty the world over, wore a size 12! If you’ve ever seen Mad Men, you’ve seen Christine Hendricks (http://www.stylehasnosize.com/tag/christina-hendricks/). I don’t know what size she wears, but it’s clear that she hasn’t missed many meals. Ditto Catherine Zeta-Jones, Adele, Queen Latifah…the list goes on. We’re gorgeous, and anyone who doesn’t appreciate that isn’t worth your time.

3) Choosing to work outside the home. Economics aside, some people think a woman who does this is selfish, doesn’t love her kids or intentionally being obstinate-ignoring traditional gender roles just for the sake of doing it. Sure, this might be true for some people, but most have completely different reasons. My mother, for instance, felt a lot better about herself once she got her real estate license. Regardless of how much money she made, it got her out of the house and allowed her to meet more people. Tell me-if my mother were depressed because she wasn’t ‘allowed’ to do these things while we were in school, what good would that do us? If depression were to suck all of the energy out of her the way it does to me, would she have had any left to give us kids? No. Contrary to what some people think, working outside the home can actually make someone a better mother.

On the other hand…

4) Choosing to be a stay-at-home mom. I’ve heard such women criticized by some of the more strident feminists as ‘continuing the patriarchal society structure that kept women back’. I can see their point, but I couldn’t disagree more. Feminism, for me, is about choices.

The problem, as I see it, is that some of us have been told that we only have so many options when it comes to career and family life. Even if it’s not explicitly said, I’ve known women in male-dominated fields who have been made to feel as though they don’t ‘belong’. It is much better now than it was in my mother’s generation, but some societies and religious groups still hold to what they view as ‘proper’ gender roles. Feminism has, among other things, given us the ability to choose what we do and where we go in life rather than having someone else (fathers, husbands, etc) make those decisions for us. Some women want to be SAHMs (Stay-At-Home Moms), and there is nothing wrong with this. In fact, I admire them; I don’t know that I’d have the patience!

5) Wanting to be appreciated for what we do. While we don’t, to quote Jesus, ‘do our deeds in public to be praised [paraphrase!],” it’s always nice to know our ‘good deeds’ do not go unnoticed. I’ve heard things like ‘you do this because that’s what you’re supposed to do-no one thanks a secretary for doing her job”. Um, I beg to differ. I’ve had employers do just that. They know that we’re the backbone; without us, their business couldn’t run. That makes me want to try that much harder to please them.

The point is that we, whatever roles we take in our lives, lay the foundation for the things that stand now and those which are to come. In raising a family, we are grooming our children to make a difference in the world. In being a wife or partner, we are giving another person the love and support they need to go about their daily life. In the professional world, we support our employers and colleagues. If we work outside the home, we help ‘bring home the bacon’ needed to do all of the things mentioned above. We are always going to be somebody’s mother, daughter, sister or friend. If you think about it, we really run the world. We let the men think that they do, but we know the truth. :)

We have been given the gift of strength and an indomitable spirit. That, my friends, should never be apologized for.

The Men of ‘Project Runway’

(Disclaimer-Neither The Prozac Queen nor her ‘subjects’ are to be held responsible for any asthma attacks suffered/deadly sins committed/computer keyboards damaged that result from reading this post. Drool at your own risk.)

I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while now, but I didn’t know if it would be weird for me to write about a TV show without having a purpose other than for my own entertainment. I’m not sure why, but the phrases ‘creepy stalker’ and ‘desperately needs a life‘ come to mind.:) I love to read reviews online, but most of those appear in ‘zines’ with people whose jobs are to watch TV and comment on it. In other words, people who get paid to do what I do for free. :) I’ve now read other people’s ‘personal reviews’ and I figured, what the heck. It’s not like anything I say will (or should) be taken seriously. So, here goes.

Despite the fact that I have about as much fashion sense as a turnip, I love watching Project Runway. If you’ve never seen it, it’s a reality show on Lifetime where a group of fashion designers complete weekly challenges for a chance to show at Fashion Week and all kinds of other awesome prizes. I especially like the ‘Unconventional Challenges’ where they make dresses out of corn husks and stuff they found in a pet store! There’s also the one where they had to talk people out of their clothes (hmm, shouldn’t we at least wait until the third date for that?) to use in their projects. I haven’t seen every season, but that’s what the internet is for. So you know what I’m talking about, here’s a link to the show’s site-http://www.mylifetime.com/shows/project-runway
There’s also the ‘All Stars’ show where they bring back designers from previous seasons to compete all over again. http://www.mylifetime.com/shows/project-runway-all-stars

Heidi Klum is the host…she’s pretty nice, but I love Tim Gunn, who serves as a sort of ‘mentor’ to the designers. He’s so classy-he has a way of telling it like it is without making you feel like a squashed bug. He would be so much fun to hang out with but, seeing as I’m a nobody, that’s about as likely to happen as my cats are to follow instructions. In other words, never. Oh well.

Like most other reality shows, half of the draw is the level of attractiveness of the contestants. However, since Lifetime caters to women, any and all ‘eye candy’ I notice is of the male variety. Finally, something just for us! :)

Now, some of you are probably asking, “Wait a sec…aren’t all these guys gay?” My answer to that is, “And? Your point is?” I don’t know, and I don’t care. Gay, straight, bi, tri…it doesn’t matter. Hotness is hotness. It doesn’t matter anyway; the closest any of us will probably get to them is licking the computer screen.* Oh, well.

In that vein, I’ve come up with the Project Runway Swimsuit Calendar. Well, not really, but here are my ‘nominees’, in no particular order.

Oh, and, they’ll be wearing clothes. Most of the time, anyway. :)

January- Kayne Gillaspie, Season 3. This beautiful man reminds me of one of my high-school boyfriends, only hotter and less annoying. Actually, it’s too bad he wasn’t my boyfriend-then maybe I wouldn’t have had to wear that God-awful peach potato sack to the prom. Oh well. I didn’t wear it for long anyway. :)

Just kidding, Ma. You can put the cattle prod away now.

Seriously…he says he has a tattoo and piercing below the waist. It’s times like this I wish I had X-ray vision.

Speaking of tattoos-

February-Fabio Costa,Season 10. Few men can carry off half of the stuff he wears. Hell, he’d probably still be drool-worthy if he were wearing nothing but Saran Wrap around…well, never mind. :) He has a friendly, sophisticated style and a personality to match. If we hadn’t met his boyfriend on the show, I’d suggest asking where else he’s had ink done…oh well.

He said his family is from Brazil. If this is what that country produces, I’m on the next flight.

March-Joshua McKinley,Season 9. Can I give this gorgeous man more than one month? Pleasepleasepleasepleaeplease? Because if those smooth, shapely arms are any indication of what the rest of him looks like, I’m going to need some time to recover! But then, he’s probably used to having women swoon over him, with that body and those gorgeous eyes of his. Wow.

Seriously, though-I do have to say that he can seem rather, um, intense. It could have just been editing, but he didn’t always come across as a very nice person. However, I think there’s a side to Joshua that didn’t come out enough during his season. Some things he’s said about his relatively-short life (esp. the loss of his mom) make me think there’s a lot more going on in his head than patterns and sequins. I’d just love to get up in there and walk around.

April-Suede, Season 5. Suede reminds me of what a friend of mine said about Lister on Red Dwarf-”he’s hot, but shouldn’t be.” Seriously, I don’t know what it is, but there is just something about him…maybe it’s the outrageous hair colors, the sense of confidence and fun he exudes or the fact that he sometimes refers to himself in the third person (okay, definitely not that :))…I’m not sure, but something about him just makes my heart go ‘a-twitter’. I’d tell you what else has that reaction, but there might be children present.

Seriously, I’ve always gone for the ‘different’ sort of guy-the kind of guy who dances with a broom at the prom or gets kicked out of McDonalds for playing in the “ball crawl”. He certainly looks the part.

May-Jerell Scott, Season 5. Jerell is the whole package-not only does he have an awesome smile and body, he’s a very intelligent guy. When he was a model (quelle surprise), he decided he’d rather make the things he wanted to wear than shell out the cash for the ‘name brands’. Considering that I’ve seen shoes that cost $500 that look like the ones in my closet I got for $20, I see his point.

He’s got that perfect amount of muscle tone-enough to see the definition, but not so much that he looks like a badly-inflated air mattress. He’s gorgeous, but doesn’t act like he knows it. Gotta love a guy like that.

June-Rami Kashou, Season 4. CAUTION: DO NOT LOOK DIRECTLY AT YOUR SCREEN. This man is so effing hot that to do so might burn your retinas. Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

But if you’re really a glutton for punishment, check out this aptly-titled video:
Eye Candy

You know what I especially like about Rami? It’s not the muscles (although those are really nice too). It’s not his smile, his easy-going manner or the fact that he could show up at my door wearing a potato sack and I’d still have a heart attack. This man has some of the most nicely-toned skin I’ve ever seen. I don’t know if he shaves his body hair (I’ve know men who do) or if he’s just that smooth, but you just want to run your hands all over it. Beautiful, beautiful man.

July-Nick Verrios, Season 2. With his good looks and ‘draping’ style, this man is practically a travel brochure for Greece. Being the son of a Greek-American diplomat, he has a very exotic ‘vibe’ about him. His work is beautiful, but the most entertaining thing about him (in addition to that hot business partner of his) is his dry wit, regularly featured in his blog on the official Project Runway website. I dare you to get through just one post without laughing. It’s not possible, especially when he comments on Tim Gunn in shorts.

Apparently Tim has charms the rest of us aren’t privy to. Hmmm.

August-Mr. April and Mr. June together. I’ve got a couple of Speedos here with their names on them. They’ll probably need them, too, in this Georgia heat.

September-Jesse LeNoir, Season 7. Hell, even his name is sexy! Judging by some of his comments in the interview section, he’s also straight. Straight, but taken. :( Oh well. In addition to being a brilliant and self-taught designer, he’s also an actor. Hmm, I wonder if he’s ever done any ‘shirtless’ scenes? I’d say ‘nude scenes’, but I think his lady might have a problem with that.

Hey, a girl can dream, can’t she?

October-Christopher Collins, Season 8. He has an amazing smile that lights up whatever room he’s in. Add that to his gorgeous eyes and fun personality, and you’ve got ‘the guy next door’. You know, the one you used to watch with binoculars and…okay, I’ll stop incriminating myself now. :)

He says he’d be a scuba instructor if he wasn’t a designer. Hmmm, I wonder if he’d give me a few lessons? Because he looks like the kind of guy who would look good wet. And shirtless. And pantless. And…Okay, on to November. :)

November-Christian Siriano, Season 4. This guy reminds me of my nephews. Now, before you try to look him up on Twitter saying, ‘Oooh, this random blogger nobody cares about called you a kid! Beat her up!”, let me explain. My nephews are six-year-old twins who have what have to be the most infectious smiles on the planet. See them smile, and you can’t help but smile yourself. Christian is the same way.

I’m not including him here as being jump-out-of-a-cake hot like Mr. March or Mr. June so much as being an interesting person. He comes off as cocky at first, but has a ‘fun’ side that comes out later. He has an amazing penchant for bright colors and, believe it or not, he’s designed some things for Payless Shoe Source! Most of his other stuff is very expensive, so it’s nice to see a top designer like him work on something us ‘regular people’ can actually afford.

December-Daniel Feld, Season 5. Okay, apparently I need to go back and watch season 5 all over again, because it seems that I’ve missed some of the most drool-worthy hunks of man out there. Daniel pulls off the ‘half-shaven’ look so well-’scruffy’ and ‘polished’ at the same time. What I find especially sweet is that, while he was in the competition, he fell in love with Wesley Nault, another contestant! Hmmm, two hotties for the price of one. Ladies, it’s our lucky day!

Dammit, I’ve run out of months. Oh, well. At least I get to see Mr. June in a Speedo. Suddenly all is right with the world.

You may commence drooling now. :)

*And before you ask, no, I haven’t done that. Too much dust.

CMC reasons not to date coworkers

1) Company policies. The vast majority of office jobs I’ve had have some sort of rule regarding employees dating, although some enforce it more than others. There’s good reason for this…Aside from discouraging ‘meetings’ in the supply closet, employers fear that relationships can affect productivity and distract employees from their work. It’s one thing if he works in a different division, Also, what if the relationship went south? Would you really want to see that person every day?

I spent a lot of my working life in restaurants and retail, so the ‘rules’ are slightly different from those in ‘serious’ companies. Aside from writing, this is the kind of work I love-after all, what other job will let you listen to Jesus Built My Hot Rod while drooling over the hotties at table 3? Not many. However, it’s often these sorts of jobs where dating a coworker can get hairy. Aside from produce coolers being crappy places to make out (find embarrassed smiley) , it’s a guarantee that…There’s only *so* much room in the kitchen…I’ve worked for places that employed married or committed couples, and things went fine….most restaurants don’t have policies against dating coworkers but, since employees *have* to work closely whether they like it or not, it’s easier for feelings-good or bad-to get in the way. I’ve been in this position…it wasn’t hard to be around him so much as seeing him act flirty with other women. That’s very ‘high school’, I know, but there you have it. Also, *everybody* will know your business-you can’t keep secrets in a small pool of employees that work closely together, no matter how hard you try.

2) appearance of impropriety. If you date someone at work and one of you is ‘above’ the other, I guarantee you there will be talk of ‘special treatment.’ It might not be true, but every workplace has That Person Who Wants Everyone To Be As Miserable As They Are. Even if your company has a ‘no gossiping’ policy…well, do you *really* think that will stop it from happening? Seriously.


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